Keep Moving Forward!

Among the many changes you'll see in the next few weeks at Healthy Writer blog we've discontinued Inspiration Sundays. However, I hope you’ll agree that this simple quote still deserves a post:

Keep Moving Forward

I’m always inspired by Walt Disney and his words. A man who started with only a creative vision and a talent for drawing began an empire. Growing up near Walt Disney World, it was easy to see the awe inspiring buildings, theme parks, and man-made lakes, but sometimes hard to remember that it all on the same shaky ground as my own writing career.

You probably didn’t know it, but Walt struggled in his early years. He did any work he could including a series of Army education films that would be considered very politically incorrect these days. Like many writers and artists he suffered setbacks: the first studio he founded went bankrupt, he lost the rights to one of his creations (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit), and he couldn’t find a distributor for either of the first two Mickey Mouse films.

Through it all, Walt kept moving forward. He tried new things and refused to look backwards for too long. His philosophy is as useful to writers as it is to people who strive to be healthy. If you’ve missed a work out, eaten an unhealthy meal, skipped a deadline, or failed horribly on a pitch, don’t dwell on it, move forward, and do better next time. As we work hard to reach our goals it’s easy to get sidetracked by the things we should have done instead planning the things we’ll do next. Don’t. Instead, give yourself a little time to look backward, then get back to work. Who knows, maybe someday you’ll be a household name just like Walt.

(This is the first in a series of posts that focus on Walt Disney World, the location of the next Romance Writers of America Conference. I’m not just a rabid Disney fan, I’m also a former employee. I’ve had the honor and the thrill of working in the Disney Reservation Center where we booked all restaurant and hotel reservations. If you have any Disney questions, please post them in the comments.)

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Falling down

I’m a runner. I’m not fast, nor graceful. I am not a thing of beauty and strength on two legs. I’m a runner who sometimes falls down. I have plenty of very good excuses why I fall, but that doesn’t stop it from happening.

You would think running is easy: left foot, right foot, repeat as necessary. But thanks to a stroke, my left foot often responds to the call to go forward by saying “Who me? Sure, yeah, I’ll get right on that…” And down I go.

The beauty of falling down often is that you learn it’s not something to be afraid of. It hurts, yes. You end up bloody and bruised, but the first steps up are the hardest. After that you’re mostly just embarrassed and a little ashamed you did something so silly. I learned that falls on concrete take longer to heal than falls on dirt, so I run in the woods.

There’s a tree along my route in the woods, one I used to hate but now I love. The tree stood as a marker. My first goal was running to the tree, then past the tree, and then to the tree, past the tree, and back to the tree. The tree talked trash to me in the beginning, long taunts of “You really think you’re going to make it? You’re already panting. I’ve stood here longer than you’ve been alive little girl. I’ve seen would-be runners come and go, and you’ll go. Trust me.” I cursed that tree for standing just ten feet away from where my breath ran out, just steps from where I had nothing left but acid in my veins and two collapsed lungs.

But after weeks that turned into months, a magical thing happened: I did run to the tree, past the tree, and back to the tree. Suddenly my tree was a symbol of what I had accomplished, a sentry standing firm over the spot where I proved I could do it. After that, the tree only told me good things, and when I fell it told me to get back up and try again.

My tree often repeats a Japanese proverb to me “Fall down seven times, stand up eight.” When it thinks I need it, it quotes Batman Begins “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.” When the winter ice makes it dangerous to visit my tree, I think about it missing me. As a writer I can be forgiven that flight of fantasy and I’ve often walked out to see that tree in snow and icy conditions when running is a very dumb idea, just to wrap my arms around it and remember how it felt to run to the tree, past the tree, and back.

Maybe you don’t fall down in the woods. Maybe it isn’t a tree that taunts you but a Big Mac. Maybe the voice inside your head belongs to someone who loved you but hurt you a little too. It doesn’t matter, falling down works the same way for everyone: it hurts but you get back up, brush yourself off, and start going again. You’ll probably limp for a few days. People will see your bruises and cringe. None of that matters. Fall down seven times, stand up eight.

In the mood to share? I’m always happy to hear about how someone picked themselves up from a spectacular fall.

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Compounding Pessimism

My husband and I were talking about the frustrations I've had in my quest to lose weight. It was an easy discussion, since this has been a good, losing week for me. And I think that losing and upbeat mindframe is what helped me really see just how negative it can get while struggling to make this habit a lifestyle, and a lifestyle that pays off.

I've likened weight loss to the writing journey before. We begin with intentions, we learn the basics and add our own twists. We find a program, a writing method, an exercise routine or diet that work for us and we... well, we work it. And we sometimes see great early successes, we sometimes see huge letdowns and we often hit brick walls that just make us want to tear our hair out.

My writing journey has been like that. I started writing and saw some immediate success. A request from my first query. A final in my first contest. Multiple Golden Heart finals (not as many as some awesome people, but enough to keep me on the edge of joy/frustration). Rejections, firing an agent, almost-sale-then-the-line-closed close calls.

A lot of slides into pessimism. If you write, how often have you asked yourself if you'll ever sell (if you've already sold, admit it, you asked the question before the call, right?) How often did we take the rejections, the setbacks personally? See them as a prognosis of overall writing success. Or worse, as a measure of ability?

And with each one, it's just another layer of doubt. Layer upon layer upon layer.

My husband calls it compounding pessimism. Each hit, each rejection, each week on the scale without a loss - all add another layer of doubt. Of negative self-talk. Of whininess (maybe that's just me?) As a hypnotherapist, I know the power of compounding messages. What we hear over and over again, what we hear over and over again in different ways, we own. We take to heart. We embrace and embody.

The trick is, compounding optimism is just as easy. And the last few weeks, I'm seeing the results of it. Just like I refused to give in to the beat-down of rejections and quit writing, I've refused to give in to the frustration of not losing weight despite my best efforts. And by not giving up, by continuing to work it just as hard as before and tweak things here and there (just like in writing) I've started seeing great results. The weight is coming off. The inches are dropping away. I'm optimistic, and with each day, I add another layer of faith and optimism to my psyche, sure that yes, I will see this goal achieved.

Compounding messages. What kind are you giving yourself? Have you ever listened to that self-talk, those thoughts that seem to sneak in? Do you see the different ways you're giving yourself the same message, over and over? And does that message help or hinder your enthusiasm as you work toward your goal?

Tawny Weber writes hot, spicy stories for Harlequin Blaze. In January 2010, her novella, YOU HAVE TO KISS A LOT OF FROGS, was out in the Blazing Bedtime Story anthology and her next full length Blaze,, RIDING THE WAVES, will be out in September 2010. Come by and visit her on the web atwww.tawnyweber.com

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