Thursday, February 11, 2010

Who's In Your Corner

I realized today that I'm very VERY lucky. Yes, for a lot of reasons, but today's realization was for a specific one. I have an incredible support in my life.

Because, lets face it, losing weight isn't easy. Maintaining weight isn't easy. Writing, for that matter, isn't easy. They all require a lot of focus, a lot of energy and a lot of motivation. And while we can probably generate those things alone, and do it quite well, its really hard to keep that going for the long term.

Which is where support comes in.

Studies show that people lose more weight if they have a support group. I don't think there have been studies done on the writing side of that, but I'd be willing to bet that people find more writing success if they, too, have a support group.

What's required to be a support group? Personally, I think it can be any number of things. My family is fabulously supportive and encouraging in both my health goals and my writing goals. My critique partner and I email daily with both our writing progress and what exercise we've done. A good friend and I check in weekly to report our weight gain or loss, keeping us both focused on our health goal. I belong to an exercise challenge group right now, too.

And then there's this blog. Right here is one great support group, isn't it? In addition, I listen to motivational podcasts (okay, granted,the speakers might not realize they are my support group... but they are).

That's a LOT of energy supporting my goal to get healthier, isn't it?

How about you? Can you list (yeah, yeah, I know, my favorite word *g*) your support people? Did you include this blog? And if the list isn't as long as you'd like, where can you look to add to it? Gym buddies, weight loss programs, good friends? Isn't everything easier if you have people in your corner rooting for your success?

Tawny Weber writes hot, spicy stories for Harlequin Blaze. In January 2010, her novella, YOU HAVE TO KISS A LOT OF FROGS, was out in the Blazing Bedtime Story anthology and her next full length Blaze will be out in September 2010. Come by and visit her on the web at


Trish Milburn (Tricia Mills) on February 11, 2010 at 8:51 AM said...

This is so important, Tawny. I've been very fortunate in my writing that my husband has supported me for years before I got published, then he supported my decision to quit my full-time job to focus on the writing.

As for exercise, this blog has been awesome. And before we started it, Michelle was very inspiring with her own efforts and helped launch me into mine. I also find reading health-related magazines, online articles, books and watching The Biggest Loser supportive in a way. They keep my mind on my own fitness and health and keep me inspired.

Also, the fact that our workshop was picked up for RWA National has inspired me to really work at the weight loss so I have a great story to tell. :)

Michelle Butler on February 11, 2010 at 9:30 AM said...

Tawny, you're so right. Support is very helpful - for any change. And, there's lots of scientific studies backing that up now as well.

Anonymous said...

I'm trying agin to post. :-) I have great support. Family & friends! Authors and non-writers. I even count my pup as a support cuz now I can walk with her. I just hate exercising "alone" and having someone to nudge me is key.

Tawny on February 11, 2010 at 12:50 PM said...

Trish, the support to quit your job is huge, isn't it? That shows so much faith and confidence that you'll succeed and had to really help you believe it when things got rough :-)

I forgot about the support of magazines - I tend to read them in waves. I'm on a down wave at the moment LOL. But yes, I totally agree that this blog rocks for support.

and YAYAYAYAY that we're doing the workshop this summer!! Talk about motivation!

Tawny on February 11, 2010 at 12:51 PM said...

Michelle, I'm always glad to have science on my side *g*

And you're right- I think support is that thing that really gets us through when willpower wears out. I read or heard recently (can't recall which) that scientists believe that willpower is like an actual muscle. It can be very strong or very weak -but like any muscle, it'll only hold tight for so long.

That'd be when we want that extra support to kick in.

Tawny on February 11, 2010 at 12:52 PM said...

Virna!!!! Hi :-) I'm so glad you could post.

YES -the puppy totally counts. Having someone or something that depends on us to follow through really does make a huge difference. When that someone or something is super cute, its even more fun :-)

Sally Kilpatrick on February 11, 2010 at 2:12 PM said...

I am so, so lucky. My mother has always told me to "shoot for the moon." She's been behind me in whatever I've tried. And my husband. Oh, he has pushed me when I needed to be pushed, consoled when I needed to be consoled. He signed me up for Grad school for Christmas to get me writing again then he took a higher paying job and told me to quit work and get to writing.

Food is a little different, but I put myself together which inspired hubby who, in turn, inspired me when I fell off the wagon.

The kids aren't quite as understanding. Apparently, my son thinks that my greatest talent is teaching. Oh, well.

As for will-power being a muscle? I'm thinking mine is flabbier than my abs then. If only there were a machine that targeted will-power--then I might stand a chance.

Tawny on February 11, 2010 at 4:03 PM said...

WONDERFUL support, Sally! That's got to give you such a solid foundation to believe you can do anything, right?

I hear you on food being a different focus, because so often its not as much of a challenge for the people around us. So while they understand on some levels our frustrations and struggle, they don't always quite get it :-)

and hey - being a great teacher is an awesome talent :-)

WriterGirl on February 13, 2010 at 9:29 PM said...

Exercise is just sooo incredibly not fun!! LOL!! Don't know if there is any other way to say it! I need to get back on track and doing my treadmill every day before I cook dinner at night. I think I'm more of a solo exerciser though. Gotta do it! :)

Paula R on March 4, 2010 at 9:44 AM said...

Hey Tawny, dropping by to share in the joy of support groups. I am one of your support group members when it comes to writing, and you are mine, though I haven't told there you have it.

I haven't really set out to lose weight before, though I probably should. A large part of that, is due to the fact that I know myself. If I try, I end up failing, and having a support group would be great. When I was training with the military, that was a great success because I had all these people behind me doing the same thing, but as a civilian it is very hard. Life just gets in the way, maybe because I let it. Sometimes I try to get started, by my support group collapses because of scheduling conflicts, meetings, etc. I hate working out alone, but I try to play a little basketball every now and then; to me that's not exercise, so it is doable. I know you will have a blast here. Keep doing what you are doing. See you around the blogosphere.

Peace and love,
Paula R.

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